The Neck of My Guitar as Seen Through a Heat Haze

I'm testing out my eyesight this afternoon and I still can't see straight lines. I try out my wang eye (the left) on my guitar and the neck shimmers and breaks up at the edges, as if looked at from a distance in a heat haze. Everything is thinner, too, especially people's faces. If I try to read it's as if publishing has been taken over by incompetent typesetters. Not that anyone uses typesetters these days - mostly to do with technology but also because typesetters were always incredibly grumpy and bad-tempered. You could be having the best day of your life, but after a five minute conversation with a typesetter you'd be left feeling desolate.